Restless Nights

Time and time again I go through nights of restlessness, nights of weariness, nights of countless sheep flying overhead but none seem to put me in the world of my dreams. I sit and think for infinite hours but yet I never come with a conclusion and I usually don’t even know what I think of, almost as if they are blank thoughts. I sit and write this at five in the morning yet I feel like it is the evening I am fully awake yet my eyes bloodshot, I am fully awake yet my body is asleep. I sit and I wonder of how it would feel to be back home, how it would feel to be roaming the streets for no reason other than to smell the fresh air, how it would feel to have pointless conversations with the old man across the store just to be a good Samaritan. I crave the traditional and cultural food of back home, I see the horizon every time my eyes close. I do not know how much longer I can take until my heart is torn from the inside of my rib cage I feel my ribs aching from my heart trying to break out, I feel my heart crying and cracking from wanting to go back to its love, its hope, its home. I pray daily to once again see you, to once again feel the warm breeze of your summers and to go through one more day just one more hour back in your presence oh beloved of mine, oh Palestine.

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